Nothing to Fear by Julie McFadden RN

Author:Julie McFadden, RN [McFadden, Julie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2024-06-11T00:00:00+00:00

The Person Dies after a Milestone

Sometimes a person chooses a date with personal significance—a holiday, wedding, birthday, or anniversary—and dies on that day. “I’m going to wait until after my grandson is born.” “I’m going to make it to my eighty-eighth birthday.” Then, they let go. Although not everyone is able to achieve it, I’ve seen many people who will hang on with a vengeance to make it to a special milestone. I’ve noticed that these people are often the ones who are very willful or independent (aka stubborn), as well as those who have deep connections to tradition or specific anniversaries that shaped their lives.

Mitzy, one of my followers on social media, shared this amazing story with me: Her mother was on hospice while Mitzy’s daughter was nine months pregnant. Mitzy was sitting in a chair beside her mom’s bed, reading, when she received a phone call that her daughter, who lived in another state, was having contractions. Mitzy was torn.

“Mom, I don’t know what to do,” Mitzy told her mother, who was still lucid. “I don’t want to leave you. I’m afraid if I leave, something’s going to happen, but I do want to see my grandson being born.”

With confidence, Mitzy’s mother assured her, “Honey, you have to go. If you don’t, you’re going to regret it. Don’t worry about me. I’m going to stay here until your grandson is born.”

Although Mitzy was conflicted about her decision, she took her mother’s advice and drove several hours to be with her daughter. When Mitzy checked in with her brother from the road a few hours into her trip, he reported that as soon as Mitzy left, their mother seemed to go into a deep sleep.

Late that night, after Mitzy arrived at her daughter’s home, they discovered that her contractions had not, in fact, meant that she was in labor. Instead, they were “false alarm” contractions called Braxton-Hicks. No labor. No grandson.

The following morning, Mitzy drove straight back home to be at her mother’s side. Even though her mother was unresponsive, Mitzy narrated the trip for her, explaining that the baby had not yet come. Then she remembered her mother’s promise.

Gently, with kind assurance, Mitzy whispered in her mother’s ear, “It’s okay, Mom. You can go. It’s okay.”

But her mother held on.

A whole week later, her mother was still unresponsive. When Mitzy’s daughter went into legitimate active labor, Mitzy repeated her trip to be with her daughter and welcome her grandson.

After the baby’s birth, Mitzy phoned her mother’s home and asked her brother to put the phone to her mother’s ear.

“Mom, we have a healthy grandson. He has ten fingers and ten toes! Everything went great.”

Mitzy’s brother called her back fifteen minutes later to let her know that their mother had died. The family would always joke that Mitzy’s mother and the grandbaby high-fived each other, one entering this world as the other was exiting.

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